My blog from today about my buddy Jason

[hoosiercop]

I think this may be the proper place to post this, if not, feel free to move it admin. Now that I think about it, maybe it might be nice to add a section to the board for "In memorium" postings. Many of us have losts friends, family, or co-workers in the line of duty. But I just wanted to copy and paste for you all what I wrote in my blog on my Myspace page today....


Jason Matthew Baker - Marion County Sheriff's Department - E.O.W. 9-17-01


It's so hard to beleive but today is the fifth anniversary of when my friend Jason Baker was killed in the line of duty. Jason was shot and killed at the end of a vehicle pursuit. I'll never forget getting home from work that night and hearing those dreadful messages on my voice mail from a friend of mine that knew I was friends with Jason.

So this morning has been a little rough for me. I got home from work about 7:30, got changed out of uniform, put on the jersey I made in memorium of him, and headed out on the hour drive to Indianapolis. I drove to Crown Hill, where Jason's marker is at in their Heroes of Public Safety section. (the Baker's had Jason cremated, so its not really his gravesite)

I figured that as early in the morning as I was going that no one would be there, but as fate would have it, Jason's dad was there. Also, the parents of Jake Laird, an IPD officer killed in 2004 were there too. They have become close friend with the Bakers. I kind of sat in my truck for a few minutes, trying to gather my composure a little bit. Then I got out and went up to the marker. The times that I have been there before, somehow I always managed to stay relatively cool. But this time it just kind of hit me and I started welling up, sniffling nose, etc. After a couple minutes, I started to stand up, still crying a little.

Jason's dad then came up from behind and put his hand on my shoulder to comfort me. Then we started talking a little bit, kind of sharing each others pain a little. Then we gave each other a hug. Mr. Baker then told me he had to go get the rest of the family. I guess he had wanted some time alone first. He's probably doing the cop thing of getting the emotions out of the way early so he can be strong for the rest of the family later. But as we each started to walk away, I told him that I would say a prayer for his family as I went to bed today. I'm not religious, but sometimes I feel like putting that kind of positive energy out there just might help things out.

Now that I'm back home, in a way I feel a little better that I got some of that emotion out. Like Mr. Baker said, the pain doesnt ever go away, but you kind of learn to get through it. Also, it was nice to be able to connect a little bit with Mr. Baker. In the past I've been kind of intimidated by him, but this was kind of nice. Hopefully I'll run into him out at Police Week next year.



"He Was A Friend Of Mine"


On the way home from Crown Hill, I was listening to this song on CD. It's Willie Nelson's rendition of the song "He Was A Friend Of Mine" from the soundtrack to Brokeback Mountain. The lyrics just kind of fit really well. I felt compelled to write them out on here.........

He... was a friend of mine.
He... was a friend of mine.
Everytime I think of him.....
I just can't keep from crying,
Cause he... was a friend of mine.

He... died on the road.
He... died on the road.
Just kept on moving.
Never reaped what he could sow.
And he... was a friend of mine.

I... stole away and cried.
I... stole away and cried.
Never had much money.
I've never been quite satisfied.
And he... was a friend of mine.

He... never done no wrong.
He... never done no wrong.
A thousand miles from home.
And he never harmed no one.
And he... was a friend of mine.

He... was a friend of mine.
He... was a friend of mine.
Whenver I hear his name, lord...
I just can't keep from crying,
Cause he... was a friend of mine.

[flblue09]

Hoosier,

On such an anniversary words seldom, if ever, seem quite adequate. We all know that the loss of a fellow officer, whether in our immediate ranks or those distant, stirs up feelings that only other uniformed personnel can comprehend. But, an in-service death of a fellow officer who is also a true, irreplaceable friend ...

well, maybe the only form of communication that can suffice is a long, secure embrace.

My arms are around you ...

[Deleted]

Hoosiercop. Thanks for sharing your blog. We have all been there and felt the pain of loss. Thank you for putting our feelings into words. This will make a very nice thread, that we can all contribute to, when we can collect our thoughts.

[1dbigjim563]

Hossier, thanks. I'm sitting here blubbering, thinking about the three friends, fellow officers, here in DC who we lost between Police week of 05 and this past January. Joe was another reserve and a classmate and the first DC Reserve Officer l-o-d death. Jim was a young up and commer I used to ride with in 1D and Robert was just a really sweet guy who sadly decided it was time to go one cold Friday afternoon.

I'm glad you got to talk to Jason's father. I wish I had kept it together when I met Jim's parents at te end of the service here for him.

When he died, I worte a little somethiong about him and posted it on a reserve site we have here, because Jim was still new (he'd been named Roookie of the Year in 1D less than two months before he died) and I wanted the Reserve Officers in the other districts to know what a great young officer Jim was. Unbeknownst to me, someone else forwarded what I wrote to the editor of the Dispatch (Our daily departmental newsletter) and he published it the same day.

Apparently some one had shown it to his parents, and when I met them in the receiving line after the service his mother recognized my name and said, "Oh, you're the one who wrote the article about Jim." Right there, and I don't know why, I started to loose it. So I said "Yes, mam," excused myself and moved on because I was embarrassed I was going to breakout blubbering in front of the family and everyone else. Now, I wic=shed blubbering or not, I'd stuck it out.

Well, I can't rewrite history, but this is a good thread, and I agree, we ought to have a memorial section on the board where we can post tributes and just let it out when we feel like it. Sorry Poppa Admin. I'm not trying to tel you how to run the site, but I jst feel that Joe, Jim, Robert, Jason and all our fallen brothers and sister earned a special place. Yes, we have the memorial here in DC with 17,000 names, but I like the idea of having a place in cyber space since the wall is a far way off for some, and since some, because their deaths weren't considered l-o-d, won't make it there. Doesn't mean they weren't good cops, and weren't close and imprtant to us, just that they didn't meet a bureaucratic test.

[bluepride]

I had heard about Deputy Sheriff Jason Baker early this year when I was speaking with aptsgt and his plans to form Alabama LEGAL. After speaking with him, I decided to check the Officer Down Memorial Homepage to find Baker’s listing. When I found the listing for Jason Baker, I was touched by the enormous amount of love and respect that his friends, family and co-workers had for him as I read their reflections. An instant respect formed as I also read about the life he lived and the way he was brutally slain in September of 2001. Jason White had also told me that Baker was a friend of Hoosiercop and if I remember correctly, I did mention that I’d heard about him, to Jon, in a posting I made.

From time to time since that day, I’ve checked Jason Baker’s page on the ODMP. It’s always a humbling experience. While I was in Washington D.C. for Police Week, I made it a point to find Jason Baker’s name etched on the Memorial Wall. Another friend had a camera with him at the time and I made sure he took a picture of Jason’s etched name.

I knew that Jason’s anniversary was coming up. The date of death being so close to September 11, 2001 made it stand out in my mind. At one point the other day, I had thought about mentioning the anniversary and Jason’s incident on the board here. I held back because I didn’t think it would be appropriate for me to do it since Jon was his good friend. But at the same time, I didn’t know if Jon was going to mention it either. I had hoped that he would but it would be his call. And Jon stepped up and posted a beautiful tribute to Jason Baker. What a nice tribute to a brave and courageous officer. And I publicly thank Jon for doing it.

And if I can be a little spiritual or whatever you’d like to call it, I believe the meeting between you and Jason’s Dad was arranged in heaven and that it was a gift from God. Jason arranged it for a reason and God executed it perfectly. I believe things like this happen all the time from the other side. And you both needed the meeting. You wore the Jason Memorial Jersey in D.C. with pride and I was impressed with it. What a great tribute! I can’t say anything more than, Rest In Peace, Jason. You have good friends still here on Earth and you’ll never be forgotten.

THE DEPUTY SHERIFF JASON MATTHEW BAKER MEMORIAL HOMEPAGE

[bentenn]

Thanks for sharing this. I dont know what to say other than I'm sorry you lost a good friend. You have my condolonces. I knew a Ky Sheriff that was killed in 1992, I didnt know him real well, but he always would stop by and buy tools off my grandpa, and we would talk. I drove down from Ohio for his funeral, over 3000 people were there from all over Ky and several states. It's never easy when you lose a fellow law officer and a friend, so sorry Hoosiercop.

[hoosiercop]

Actually, while we are still talking about it, I had made a memorial page of my own for Jason a while back. I'll put the link to it below.

www.geocities.com/jasonbakermemorial/Tribute.html

It has a breif rehash of what happened 5 years ago, and I put some exerpts from some emails Jason sent me when we first met. There is a guestbook section, where some people had put messages in, but at one point I had to redo the page and those were lost. Also I put a couple pictures of Jason on my myspace page as well.

Yeah, I think how me and Jason White got started talking online was cause J.W. was online friends with J.B. Its weird how things are so interconnected sometimes. It is a very small world indeed. Heck, because of another guy that Jason Baker was online friends with, I ended up meeting another guy who is one of my best friends now (a closted cop in the DC area).